It’s certainly been a weekend of doom, with the mud-slinging and name-calling, the political apocalypse and doomsday forecast, people would be forgiven for wanting to up sticks and relocate to the Costa Del Sol, hmm, except … anyway, despite us finding ourselves in a bit of a bloody mess, there are reasons to be cheerful.
Sure, we’re all feeling a little bit sick and, I don’t doubt, many of us wishing we could turn around and say ‘only joking, we love EU really!’ The simple fact is, we can’t.
Suck it up people, we’ve made our bed and now in it, we must lie.
Think the world is over? Relax, here are 15 reasons to calm the fuck down about Brexit.
1. People are involved
For too long, politics has been a two-horse race with people sitting by and accepting what they’re given. This wasn’t a general election but it was a vote and, man, were the people heard. Whether you’re thrilled with the outcome or pulling your hair out with despair, one thing this has shown us, we live in a truly democratic society.
2. The government aren’t corrupt
Because believe it, if they were, we wouldn’t be sitting where we are now.
3. People are being heard
And for the first time, in my life time at least, the government are going to have to sit up and take notice of the people they are governing.
Referendums are a gamble (no shit, Sherlock) now maybe our politicians will pull their finger out of their elitist arses and realise they work for us, not the other way round.
4. There’s change at the top
Cameron gone, Corbyn going, MP’s dropping like flies – thanks to Brexit we’re seeing a shake up like never before – and, when it comes to people with power, presumption and complacency are the devil.
Change in government is a good thing, even if you do feel like a rudderless boat for a while.
5. House prices are going down
House prices are off the scale, with fewer people being able to afford to buy year on year. It’s been two days since the referendum results and, guess what, prices have dropped already, with the average house price being predicted by experts to decrease by approximately 10 percent in 2016.
Happy days for first time buyers.
6. The EU wasn’t perfect
In fact, there was a lot wrong with it. But, like a shit relationship you’re now out of, it’s easy to look back on it and only remember the good bits.
But the EU was a controlling boyfriend who told you when you were allowed to go out with your friends, what you were allowed to wear whilst taking half your wages every month for the privilege of doing so.
Being single *can* be fun.
7. There are plenty of prospering countries outside of the EU
And as economies go, China is looking a damn site healthier than Greece at the moment.
8. We make the rules
Sovereignty, eurgg, such a dusty and outdated word – *but* sovereignty does means we have more control over our own affairs.
And can buy what we want from wherever we want without having to get the nod from big Daddy in Brussels first.
9. Given the bombshell over the weekend, things aren’t looking *that* bad
Sure, everyone is crapping themselves and the left-wing media would have people believe that Armageddon will be coming to a high street near you soon, but actually, break down the facts and, we might be up shit creek, but we certainly have a paddle.
The pound is lower, but not dramatically, and, despite reports of plunges of banking stocks in the FTSE 100 – there will always be readjustments in times of uncertainty, it isn’t permanent and will stabilise when everyone calms the f**k down.
10. They’ll be no emergency budget
Whether Ozzie wants to get on our good side in a bid to become the next PM or he never meant it in the first place, the good news is there’s no immediate budget planned.
*Resumes Westfield shopping trip as planned*
11. We’re still in NATO and the UN
Which means we are unlikely to become target practise anytime soon.
12. We’re not going back to the dark ages
And my guess is, far less than first thought will change, post Brexit.
The government is already dithering about article 50 (ie. Leaving) Old Bozza has already issued a statement backtracking on much of his Brexit plan and there are ‘out’ voters already claiming they didn’t really mean it (eh?)
Leaving the EU wouldn’t be as scary as you think it will be.
13. We’re still in Europe
The EU is not the same as Europe, so for those bidding farewell to french cheese, Spanish holidays, Greek ouzo and Austrian schnitzel, get a grip.
14. We do save on our EU budget contribution
Maybe not as much as touted around during the campaigns but yes, we do save money and yes, it can be spent directly on services here.
15. We won’t close the borders, we’ll control the borders
And welcome people from all over the world, not just prioritize those in the EU.
And who doesn’t love an Australian barman.