I read an article recently, claiming that there is a new trend sweeping the Nation. That trend being for women to stage mock hen nights in a bid to meet men. The theory being, I would imagine, that one is more likely to pull in a drunkard group. And that the element of unobtainability (although my understanding was that, commonly, it was only one hen per night) adds to the hunter/gather dynamics of the evening.
I’m not quite sure what to make of this. On the one hand I am pleased to see that people are taking the initiative to get off line and actually adventure out into the real world to meet significant others/get shagged, albeit in a staged and totally misleading environment. My other thoughts are, however, that it strikes me as a little bizarre that the best way to pull is to appear totally unavailable, completely pissed and wear a learner plate or a fake penis strapped to your person.
On this subject, I have known of a number of situations where the person has either pulled or been pulled in a hen/stag environment. The last bite of the pie, so to speak. Now, I’m sure you are all quite aware of my open mindedness and liberal attitude towards sex however, even by my devil-may-care standards, I cant help but feel that when one is about to commit one’s life to another person, having a one night stand 3 weeks before might not be the best grounding for a long and fruitful relationship.
The person that chain smokes a packet of cigarettes before giving up smoking or eats a roast, 3 mars bars and a curry the day before starting a diet … they’re the people that succeed, right? Hmm …
As way of research I Googled ‘reasons to re-think get married’ and was met with a number of interesting, and indeed, very valid reasons not to enter into a life of wedded matrimony.
Questions to ask yourself included -
- Do you and your partner have a large amount of debt?
- Does your partner have children from a previous marriage?
- Are you happy with the way you and your partner are?
- Do you and your partner have the same goals?
- Do you and your partner share the same religion?
- Do you and your partner share hobbies?
- Have you found yourself on the receiving end of a blow job from a lap dancer in Las Vegas recently??!
People. Wake up and smell the divorce papers. One last fling on a stag night isn’t a final bit of fun (though, heaven knows, if that’s what you’re calling it then your marriage is already up shit creek) it’s a one way ticket to a life of resentment, regret and solicitors fees.
You see, here’s the thing. You don’t have to get married. Call me crazy, but my thoughts are, when a Las Vegas lap dancer is sucking your cock days before you walk down the aisle, you might want to re think your plans.
That’s not to say, and God knows, I find this equally as ridiculous, that you have a joint hen/stag night … loathed are the couple that can’t bare to be apart for longer than 12 hours, but honestly, full sex with total strangers? … I wouldn’t just re-think the wedding, I’d call time on the whole frigging relationship.
Unless of course your wife is a lap dancer in Las Vegas who gives amazing blow jobs in which case, crack on, now that’s a happy marriage.